Relationships

You never know going in if it is meant to be for a reason, a season or a lifetime. Each encounter provides more data, more insight into

yourself and others and it helps to gather knowledge of the kinds of people you want to surround yourself with.  Be clear

on your boundaries and be sure that the relationship enhances your life as opposed to draining your energy. Gauge how you feel. Be

sure to be authentically you because otherwise you do a major disservice to yourself and others as the true self cannot hide forever.  

Even if you want a partner and feel Ionely, don’t settle or be with someone just to fill the need to not be alone as it often better to be

alone than to be with someone who makes you feel alone.  Ask yourself if the relationship feels balanced, if both parties are equally

interested in one another if there’s a give and take, an ebb and flow. We sometimes get so wrapped up in the idea of love that we rush

into sex, intimacy, moving in together, even getting married without doing our due diligence. People spend more time asking questions to

a potential employer than a potential spouse. We want to know what hours we are expected to work, what the benefits are, how and

when we are compensated, when we get breaks and time off and so on and so on.

When we first meet someone, we sometimes make excuses for the other person and instead of seeing how things are, we paint the

portrait we want to see and ignore the potential red flags and fill the rest in as perfect. Our instincts provided glimpses that things may

not have been quite right but we ignored our instincts to fill an immediate void and cast aside initial doubts that should have been

pursued. It is like putting a filter on a picture to highlight the best image or to change the image to suit the version we hold in our mind.

Then we end up disappointed that the reality doesn’t measure up.

Also, what does the other person see in you?  Are they actually seeing the real you? Do you go out of your way to be accommodating and

pleasing to the other person and lose yourself in the process? A person’s true colors will eventually shine because there is no hiding

yourself forever. So, be yourself and take the time to get to know someone and allow the process to unfold naturally.

You can’t force puzzle pieces that simply don’t fit.

Although I find value in every new encounter, I am much quicker to move past situations that don’t work. In doing so, I make room for the

people I am meant to spend more time with.

Don’t settle for someone to be with. Take the time to find someone you don’t want to be without!